Fandare (The Complex Book 0) Read online

  “We weren't that close.”

  “And whose fault is that? Yours.” It was all I could do to keep my magic at bay from my anger. “Every time I tried to get close to you, you ran away. And now I know why. You didn't want to be with me. You didn't want to be bonded with me.”

  “No, Fandare, you don't understand.” She grabbed my arm.

  “Then make me understand.” It pained me to pull away from her and walk to the other side of the room.

  “I do want to be bonded with you—that's the whole problem.”

  I threw up my hands in disgust and started pacing the room. I wanted to rip it apart and destroy everything in front of me. My mind spun. I was bonded, destined to be together forever, and she hadn’t told me. She'd known for months—she'd known for over a year and nothing was said to me. “I don't get you,” I said, ignoring the waves of anxiety coming from her.

  “Fandare, please let me explain everything. I told you a little bit about my upbringing. I was always an outcast—I was never part of anything, and my family disowned me. You can tell that I'm not quite Human and I'm not quite Meta. I'm in between, something completely different. A half-breed. No one wanted me. My mother had no idea what type of Meta my father was and ended up disgusted with me. I had to grow up on my own, only relying on myself. I had a few people that I called friends along the way, but unfortunately, in the system we live, most of them end up dead at some point or another. I only ever had myself to rely on.”

  “Then you should be ecstatic that there was somebody that would always be there for you—that would never leave you. You don't understand, I can't leave you.”

  “I know that, but let me finish telling you my story,” Cyn begged.

  I took a deep breath, leaned up against the wall, and crossed my arms, waiting for her to continue. I tried to keep myself calm so I could hear her. I might have been supremely upset with her—angry with her—but I could not stop the joy of knowing we were bonded. She was a part of me and I was a part of her.

  Her chest rose and she took a deep breath. “I got caught by the wrong people—the wrong Meta. There was only one thing that I could do to gain my freedom. They're searching for an ancient relic and they know that one of the Metas here in the Complex has it. If I can find it and steal it, I will give it to them they will grant me my freedom. If not, they're going to sell me to the highest bidder. And I'm sure you can imagine what type of people are going to be bidding on me and exactly what's going to happen. My first and foremost goal is to find that relic and get my freedom. Once that happened and I’d delivered it I would be free, I was going to come find you and let you know everything. Then we could live the rest of our lives together and not have this hanging over our heads.” She took a deep breath and bit her lip.

  I watched as tears rolled down her face, and I felt that for her to show that kind of vulnerability—that kind of weakness—in front of me was huge. To open up and tell me everything took great trust on her part. “But don't you understand? I'm your bonded mate, which means I will do whatever it is to protect you. With every essence of my life I was made to protect you, to bring you the most joy that any person could ever have. That's all that I have for you. Do you understand the type of money that Lucian and I have been making here? It doesn't matter, we have the money. We could be the highest bidder.”

  Cyn shook her head. “But I don't want to be bought—and I understand that we're bonded and that we're in this together, but in the back of my head I would always think that you had paid for me and I was your property.” Her words tumbled out, one on top of the other.

  “But it doesn't work that way. We're bonded—you're the one that chose the bonding, not me. With your plan, I would've been left an empty shell of a man, believing you had disregarded the bonding that magic chose for us, not knowing you didn't. This assumption on my part would have forced me to live the rest of my life searching for something that I didn't know I was missing. I would've never had an opportunity to find happiness. You're the one that held all the power. I could give you everything I have to my name. I would give it all away for you. Don't you understand? You have the power—you always had the power. I could spend all the money in the galaxy for your freedom, but you would still have the power over me.”

  “But is it really your money? I thought everything you and Lucian were doing was for the clan.”

  I crossed to her and gathered her shaking body close to mine. “You still don’t get it. We’re family—you’re part of the clan now. All of this would be for you.”

  “I don't know what to say. I've never had anything like those words said to me before.”

  “You’ll be hearing them for a few thousand lifetimes. Now tell me everything about this relic, along with who you've already searched so we can find it and you can have your freedom and not have to worry or think that I bought you.”

  Chapter Ten

  CYN

  March 9, 6 AS

  “I’m not leaving.” Fandare folded his arms across his chest and glared at me.

  I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself. We’d had a long night going over every Meta in the Complex, and while before I had bonded with Fandare I didn’t need much sleep, since the bonding was completed I didn’t physically need any. That didn’t mean that I wasn’t mentally exhausted and wished I could fall into a dreamless sleep for a day or two. But I knew that was impossible anymore.

  “You cannot be seen coming and going from my room. These are singles’ quarters—it is only supposed to be me in here. We could get into trouble, and I cannot do anything to jeopardize getting kicked out of the Complex now. I really don’t want to be sold.” I lifted my chin in defiance.

  “You haven’t been listening, because I said that even if they were going to sell you we’d find a way to get to you. There is no way that somebody else will take you away from me. You do not want to piss off a Strogi.”

  “I understand that, but that doesn’t mean that you can stay here overnight. You need to leave,” I said.

  “I hate to inform you, but I already did. It’s almost dawn.”

  My shoulders slumped. “How are you going to leave without being seen? This isn’t going to be good.”

  “Evidently, with everything that happened last night you forgot that the last time we were seen together on surveillance was when we were walking to the main dome to watch the meteor shower. I used my magic and brought us back here, not on camera. In fact, no one really knows where either one of us is right now. I can come and go as I please with no one knowing I am here.”

  “What about Lucian?” I asked.

  “I’m going to have to tell him.”

  “No, no, no, no. You can’t tell him. The fewer people that know, the better. As it is, everything could be ruined with just you knowing why I am here.”

  “He’s my brother and the leader of the clan. There is no one I trust more with my life and with yours than him.”

  “I don’t want anyone to know about this,” I begged him.

  “I can completely understand that, but you need to look at this from my point of view. Together we are very strong because we are bonded, and if you add Lucian and Halley to the mix we would be a force to be reckoned with. We could find the relic faster—no one could stop us.”

  “Halley can’t know. She’s far too important to be put in any possible danger.”

  He grabbed me. “What do you mean she’s far too important?”

  “She’s pregnant.”

  “What?” His brow furrowed. “How can that be? She’s not full Strogi.”

  I placed my hand on his chest, wanting to calm him. “I’ve done research and know only full-blooded Strogi can reproduce. I don’t know what has changed, why she was able to become pregnant, but your clan needs this child.”

  Fandare backed away from me and sat down heavily on the chair. “You cannot know what it is like for us. There are so many bonded couples that don’t have children. Our numbers have dwindled because we ar
e all related in some distant way or another. If they could get pregnant, then maybe other couples would be able to also. It would mean all the difference to our clan. Between the money we’ve been making here, and now Halley pregnant, it looks like the tides are finally changing. We’ll be able to make a difference for our clan.”

  “I understand all that, Fandare, and now you know why Halley has to be kept out of this. She can’t know. And if Lucian knows, then he’s going to tell Halley, and she can’t have that added stress.”

  “She is his bond. He will do whatever it is to keep her safe, and if that means keeping something from her, then he will.”

  I raised an eyebrow. “Should I be worried about this for myself in the future—you hiding things from me to keep me safe?”

  Fandare flashed his charming smile. “I would never dream of doing that to you.”

  “Sure.” I rolled my eyes and made a mental note for the future. “But is it really fair to put Lucian in that position?”

  “You do not understand how it works in our clan. When I tell Lucian about the relic and the reason you must find it, he will immediately ask what the clan needs to do in order for you to have your freedom. That is what it is like for us—there is nothing we will withhold from each other.”

  “I don’t want Halley swept into my mess. She’s too nice to be included in this. I don’t want her tainted by my life.”

  “My sweetest Cyn, Halley’s a lot stronger than you give her credit for, and while I do agree she is very nice, you need to understand there are things about her you are not aware of. She is stronger, and has seen more things than you know. Besides, we are running out of time. They can both help us.”

  “Not now.” I shook my head. “Give me some time to think about it. I’m not saying no, just not right now. We still have some time, to change my mind—and then at that point we might need more help, but for right now, I want it to be just the two of us.”

  “At least you’re including me now.” He walked over and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me tight against him. “You wouldn’t mind spending some extra time with me—you know, just enjoying each other’s company, not thinking about what could go wrong, just you and me.”

  My stomach fluttered and I gripped his shoulders tight, trying to hide the fact that my fingers were trembling. What he suggested sounded wonderful to me. To simply be, without any worry, and enjoy him. We had some time before either one of us was due into work. I deserved to enjoy my bond, my Fandare.

  When I nodded, he picked me up, carried me to the bed, and lay down with me. Using his magic, he transformed the white walls of my quarters to a lush tropical beach. We could hear the waves crashing on the rocks, and I breathed in the salty air while a cool breeze tickled my skin. Looking into his eyes, I was focused on him and wasn’t thinking about any outside worries.

  Chapter Eleven

  FANDARE

  March 9, 6 AS

  The last thing I wanted to do was be separated from Cyn, but I had to talk to Lucian. We’d made the compromise that I could tell him, and only him, about the fact that we were bonded. As it stood right then, she didn’t want me to tell him anything else. I used my magic to enter the backroom of the UniBrew where I knew my brother was.

  Lucian didn’t look up from the box he was opening. “Do I need to worry about you and Cyn? You know she’s an employee here and I’ve grown fond of her. I’d hate to have to kick your ass.”

  I smiled. “As if you could.”

  “Do I need to remind you of all the times I have done exactly that?”

  “Or I could remind you of all the times I was the victor.”

  “Maybe we could call it a tie. But seriously, don’t mess with her. I can tell she has some deep history she keeps hidden from everybody.”

  “Oh, trust me, I know.” I straightened up. “As leader of our clan, there is something you need to know.”

  Lucian became still, and slowly stood up and turned to face me. “What is it?”

  “Cyn and I are bonded.”

  “Are you sure? There’s got to be a mistake. The odds of both of us becoming bonded here on the Complex in such a short span would be impossible.”

  “Tell me about it. But it explains so much of how I have been feeling since I arrived—especially toward her.”

  “Let me get this straight: you met her one of our first days here at the Complex, which means she’s been marked for over a year and a half, and she is just now saying something to you? And how do you go from having one date together to being bonded? Is it real?”

  “How do you know that you and Halley are bonded?” I waited for Lucian to say something. “By your silence I see you understand where I am coming from. Anyway, as you said, she has a lot of things from her past that she carries over. She was trying to work through them all before coming to me.”

  “Now I understand—you asked her out on a date and it sped things up. You always were the impatient one.”

  “You could say the point is we are bonded and she is now part of our clan.”

  “This is good news. She will make an excellent addition, and I would be proud to call her sister. Halley is going to be excited beyond belief.”

  “Here’s the thing,” I said. “Cyn didn’t want either of you to know right now. I had to work hard just to be able to tell you. She understands that you are my brother and leader of the clan, and therefore need to know. But she doesn’t want Halley to know just yet. Cyn wants to get through the time here in the Complex and off this planet before she tells her. Until then, we’ll continue as we have been.”

  “Okay.” Lucian slowly nodded. “What else aren’t you telling me?”

  “You have to understand that I’m caught in a very difficult situation here. I have the wishes of my bonded partner and the wishes of my leader. I’m trying to walk the delicate line between satisfying both of you. But you know I would never do anything to harm the clan. You’re going to have to trust me.”

  “I’ve always trusted you—that’s never been the issue. And since this extends to your bond, she also has my trust. But understand, if there is anything that puts any of us in danger, I need to know at once so we can rectify the situation and we are all kept safe.”

  “That I can do. Now where is your lovely wife?”

  “She should be here shortly. She hasn’t been feeling too well these past few months.” Lucian turned back to unloading the boxes.

  “And you’re only telling me this now?” I narrowed my eyes at him.

  “She didn’t want anyone to know.”

  “Have you seen the medical staff?”

  “No, we don’t need to.”

  “I can’t believe that you are so careless with your wife, your bonded mate. This is serious.”

  “I know it is serious—trust me, I know. Everything will be all worked out in a few months. Shortly after we have left here and are back home.”

  “I need you to tell me what is going on,” I said. I knew exactly what was going on, since Cyn had told me Halley was pregnant.

  Lucian sighed and turned toward me. “Halley is pregnant. She is going to have our child.”

  “How far along is she?”

  “About four months.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me? For the past four months, I could have been helping you with her. You know this is uncharted territory. Yes, her lineage goes back to the Strogi on Earth, but she is not full-blooded. The idea that she was even able to become pregnant to begin with is a gift, but you have no idea what this pregnancy is going to be like, or the birth. What it could do to her. I could have helped. I still can. I will be able to calm her if she is feeling anxious about anything.”

  “Yes, I know that brother, but you don’t understand. Aside from being tired, she’s been doing remarkably well. Trust me, if it ever arose that I needed your help, you would have been there quicker than I could finish the thought.”

  “Please come to me, even if you think she if fine. She could be having some
anxiety she isn’t telling you about.”

  “Interesting this all should come up now,” Lucian said. “We were just talking this morning about telling you.”

  “So were Cyn and I.”

  Lucian frowned at me. “What do you mean?”

  “Cyn knew she was pregnant. She seems to think it has something to do with our bonded marks. That is why she knew, and that is why Halley got pregnant.”

  “Show me,” Lucian demanded.

  I took my shirt off and turned around so he could see my back. I heard him gasp, and his hand touched the tree on my back.

  “The Tree of Life,” he whispered. “And Cyn has the exact same thing?”

  “She does. So, while she didn’t realize what was going on in the beginning, once you and Halley bonded, she knew more. Then she took the time to do research on the Strogi and the Tree of Life. That’s how she knew Halley was pregnant and how Halley actually became pregnant—because they are so close together every day, and because the two of us were in the process of being bonded it, would somehow seek out the same Metas.”

  “It’s a very interesting spin on things.”

  “I know. I still don’t know what it all means. All I know is that she is perfect, and we are together.”

  Chapter Twelve

  CYN

  March 9, 6 AS

  I felt awkward and out of sorts all morning. I couldn’t believe I was bonded to Fandare, and he knew what was going on with the relic. For the first time in a long time, I felt optimistic about my future—like we were going to figure it all out and there was an opportunity for my happily ever after. The urge to tell Halley what was going on was extreme, but I knew I couldn’t; I had to keep her away from it. I didn’t want her anywhere near my situation if everything went wrong.